Baseball is Boring?

It's a tired refrain to keep saying that the game is lame.

Whenever someone says that it is not a game of passion
That it’s boring, uneventful, a waste of time and interaction
Bashin’ on the game because it’s slow and out of fashion
I am saddened to the core by their misplaced dissatisfaction

And it hurts me in my soul, in the place where my love is
Where baseball set up roots long ago and it touches
Every mem’ry in my brain, every feeling in my heart
Every bat, every ball, every glove, and every start

Because the game is far from dull, even in its evolution
From playing with your gut through analytic revolution
A solution that has made it change its shape and fill new space
But on its face all the things that make it great are still in place

Use a rounded bat to smash a ball as best you can
By the way here it comes at near 100 in a span
Of just 60 feet (add 6 inches for good measure)
Read the spin, will it move? Should you swing? What’s your pleasure?

If the ball gets put in play, holy moly that’s amazing!
But now the pitcher’s got your number, bro, and he’s appraising
Paraphrasing all the thoughts in his head to strike you out
When the battle reconvenes, you got the hit, he got the scout

These conflicts are the tiny little games within the game
And to an untrained eye I understand it looks the same
But the nuance is the payoff that makes it so intriguing
And hearing all the hate about the league is so fatiguing

Pay attention to the small stuff that happens every pitch
Where the fielders reposition, how the count determines which
Approach they try to take to ensure the batter fails
And the way the hitter moves to attempt to tip the scales

So much of the game happens up between the ears
Where anxiety and fear can take control and commandeer
The thinking in your head and the feelings in your parts
In your heart and your head, where the science meets the arts

There are some elements about the game that I’ll concede
The games can feel too long at times and even I’d agree
That the way that baseball sells itself leaves lots to be desired
And things would be much better if Rob Manfred just got fired

The tinkering with balls and all the sticky stuff policing
Ban the shift, robo umps, don’t flip bats? It’s not increasing
Any love for the game where popularity’s decreasing
But it’s not the on-field product that’s relentlessly displeasing

It’s the silly superficial tweaks made by MLB
The non-representative decisions that we see
Baseball isn’t broken, just like life it’s in the systems
And the silly things we gripe about are merely just the symptoms

There’s a plethora of people with ideas to make it better
Good ideas from the people who consume it and endeavor
To preserve our nation’s pastime as just that for generations
Free from conflict, free from quarrel, free from further complications

So when you say that it’s boring I’m not quite sure what you mean
Is it hard to feel connected? Do you perceive it as serene?
The beauty’s in the nuance, in the thinking, in the chess
The excitement’s in the dingers, in the strikeouts, and finesse

Whenever someone says that it is not a game of passion
That it’s boring, uneventful, a waste of time and interaction
Bashin’ on the game because it’s slow and out of fashion
I am saddened to the core by their misplaced dissatisfaction

 

Photo by Kelly Sikkema | Adapted by Ethan Kaplan (@DJFreddie10 on Twitter and @EthanMKaplanImages on Instagram)

Matt Goodwin

Husband. Dad. Teacher. Writer. Podcaster. Baseball Fan. Quippy. Makes up words. FSWA. IBWAA.

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