First and foremost, that title may be the worst pun I’ve come up. Seriously, it’s terrible. Anyway, the saga of Aaron Sanchez took another turn yesterday as he went 4.1 IP, 6 ER, 10 Hits, 1 BBs, 3 Ks against the freakin’ Oakland Athletics. But he gained 20 pounds during the off-season! His command is in order! He has a 5 pitch repertoire! (Someone actually told me that he had a five pitch repertoire…which included both of his Fastballs and two different types of Changeups.) This happens every year. We get hyped about certain guys over Spring Training and we want to believe its the next Cliff Lee who suddenly put it together overnight and dominated for years. Sanchez isn’t that guy. We’ve been riding the wave because the wave is super cool outside of stadiums, and it’s time to stop expecting a Top 30 talent who people think is just as good as Marcus Stroman. Now, he does get the Rays next and he could easily be productive there, I would simply be entering it with the mentality that Sanchez is the back-end of my rotation, not the middle-end (because that’s totally a thing), or, heaven forbid, front-end.
Let’s see what every other SP did yesterday:
Jose Quintana – 7.0 IP, 0 ER, 4 Hits, 2 BBs, 4 Ks. That’s three straight quality starts, and his first was just one out away from the silly metric. Did you know his FIP is 1.86 with an 8+ K/9 and a sub 2 BB/9? You didn’t? Well now you know, and knowing is half the battle. G.I. Joe!
Aaron Nola – 7.0 IP, 1 ER, 4 Hits, 2 BBs, 7 Ks. If you still don’t love Nola, there’s something wrong with you.
Justin Verlander – 7.0 IP, 2 ER, 4 Hits, 2 BBs, 10 Ks. And now we remember why I placed Verlander in the Top 30. He’s pretty good y’all.
Jeff Samardzija – 7.2 IP, 1 ER, 6 Hits, 0 BBs, 5 Ks. Well, well, well. Loose Lips decided not to sink ships today, but hey, even when he actually provides a productive outing, he still only gave you five strikeouts. Against the Marlins. Yuuuuuuup.
Jon Lester – 7.0 IP, 1 ER, 5 Hits, 1 BBs, 4 Ks. Aces gonna kinda ace. He’s only fanned nine batters in his two starts against Cincy this year, which is just weird. Whatever, he’ll be hanging around the Top 20 all season kinda like that odd kid you don’t know all too well but he’s part of the group anyway. Yes he’s wearing a polo shirt tucked into his jeans.
Steven Wright – 6.2 IP, 0 ER, 4 Hits, 5 BBs, 6 Ks. There’s a reason I do the Don’t trust a knuckleballer schtick every time. It’s because you can’t depend on Wright/Dickey to be beneficial to your team every time they head to the mound, regardless of who they are facing. And when he finally gives you 6 Ks and 0 ER, you still get a 1.50 WHIP. Don’t trust a knuckleballer.
Josh Tomlin – 6.2 IP, 1 ER, 4 Hits, 1 BBs, 4 Ks. Tomlin may the most underrated pitcher hanging out on your waiver wire. Do you want him against the Twins next week? Does a bear ship in the woods? I don’t think that’s the right phrase. I don’t think you have a job. Noted.
Chris Young – 6.0 IP, 2 ER, 4 Hits, 1 BBs, 10 Ks. The last Young struck out 10 batters, it was 2008 when Indiana Jones was making a return to theaters. And we all know how that turned out.
Andrew Cashner – 6.0 IP, 1 ER, 3 Hits, 1 BBs, 4 Ks. I’m Cashing Out and you should too. The strikeouts are never coming.
Hisashi Iwakuma – 8.0 IP, 2 ER, 6 Hits, 1 BBs, 3 Ks. I’ll take it, but I need more than 3 Ks to endorse Hisashi if I’m going to roll with him before the inevitable injury in, say, June. Whatevs, still Top 50.
Sonny Gray – 7.0 IP, 3 ER, 6 Hits, 3 BBs, 7 Ks. This isn’t very good, but it was against the Jays, so I’ll give him a pass. This time.
Gio Gonzalez – 6.0 IP, 2 ER, 6 Hits, 1 BBs, 8 Ks. Now that’s the Gio you want to see next to you in bed when you wake up. But you definitely don’t want to see 4 strikeout Gio when you wake up. AHHHH! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH 8 STRIKEOUT GIO!?
Nick Tropeano – 5.1 IP, 2 ER, 4 Hits, 4 BBs, 5 Ks. Our Call Boy didn’t fully come through and I think it’s time to let him go as he gets the Royals next. Maybe bring him back for the Brew Crew. Probably.
Matt Harvey – 5.0 IP, 2 ER, 7 Hits, 1 BBs, 5 Ks. This is a good step in the right direction. He’s going to be A-OK people.
Adam Wainwright – 6.0 IP, 3 ER, 7 Hits, 1 BBs, 2 Ks. This isn’t a good enough step in the right direction. Wain-O gets the Dbacks next and that could be a disaster.
Jon Moscot – 5.0 IP, 3 ER, 3 Hits, 4 BBs, 2 Ks. Let’s be real here. No one was holding their breath to see how I interpreted this start from Moscot. Hint: If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, it’s probably a duck. Or a fake duck with a speaker playing duck noises. You never know.
Matt Moore – 6.2 IP, 4 ER, 8 Hits, 2 BBs, 5 Ks. Just like Sanchez, we have to keep our expectations in check with these pitchers. The upside is there, yes, but the Polish isn’t. Just like the winners circle of the 100m dash. When have you ever seen a Pole compete in the 100m dash? Maybe in Pole Vaulting. Ayyyyy lmao.
Zach Davies – 6.0 IP, 4 ER, 9 Hits, 1 BBs, 5 Ks. If you can believe it, there was a time that Davies was considered a decent prospect to stash in dynasty leagues. What a time that was.
Patrick Corbin – 6.0 IP, 4 ER, 7 Hits, 1 BBs, 3 Ks. A trio of HRs will do this to you Corbin. Get it together.
Scott Kazmir – 5.0 IP, 4 ER, 6 Hits, 1 BBs, 3 Ks. Kaz did face the Rockies in Coors and gets Miami next so don’t do something stupid.
Jon Gray – 5.0 IP, 5 ER, 7 Hits, 2 BBs, 10 Ks. Look, Gray can be productive when pitching outside of Coors. “Can” is the key word there. It’s also pretty key that this start was in Coors. Gray has limited upside, pitches his home games at Coors Field, and doesn’t deserve a spot on your team. This should be the blurb for every Colorado starter.
Martin Perez – 5.2 IP, 5 ER, 5 Hits, 2 BBs, 2 Ks. Perez is a BABIP worshipper who needed to sacrifice a little more before tonight’s harvest.
Bud Norris – 4.0 IP, 4 ER, 5 Hits, 2 BBs, 4 Ks. Nud Borris is still living up to his name.
CC Sabathia – 4.2 IP, 3 ER, 9 Hits, 3 BBs, 2 Ks. There’s a reason they don’t call him AA.
Jonathon Niese – 5.1 IP, 4 ER, 10 Hits, 2 BBs, 2 Ks. This is the Niese you never wanted. I wanted a nephew instead.
Yovani Gallardo – 2.0 IP, 4 ER, 5 Hits, 1 BBs, 0 Ks. He left with shoulder discomfort after the second. And I left with stomach discomfort after the first.
Collin McHugh – 4.0 IP, 5 ER, 10 Hits, 1 BBs, 3 Ks. His Slider still isn’t getting the movement it had in 2014, which means we’re not going to be happy with his performances overall.
Jarred Cosart – 4.1 IP, 6 ER, 8 Hits, 6 BBs, 1 Ks. Cosart is probably the worst starter on the Marlins. On the Marlins.
Kyle Gibson – 3.0 IP, 7 ER, 7 Hits, 2 BBs, 1 Ks. If you own Gibson, please stop doing that. For realsies.
Hector Santiago vs. Seattle Mariners – Santiago featured increased velocity last time out as well as extra movement, which could spell a small breakout + the Mariners are a decent team to let it ride.
Derek Holland vs. Chicago White Sox – The Chi Sox aren’t looking good and Holland could pull off a Win without killing your ratios. Keep in mind, this is assuming Jerad Eickhoff and Mike Leake are taken in your league
Game of the Day
Blake Snell at New York Yankees – If you own Snell now, I’d be cautious to start him here. He’s walked 3 batters in his last two minor league starts, and he’s going to be up just for this one game to allow Erasmo Ramirez to rest after a long Red Sox game earlier this week. Regardless, I’m going to be watching this game to see how the kid looks.