Okay, maybe that headline is misleading since Carlos isn’t turning over a new leaf at all. Just don’t go comparing us to some clickbait nonesense about how you’ll never believe what this one person you don’t care about it did. I NEVER CARED AND I CAN BELIEVE IT. Anyway, Mr. Carlos Rodon was originally regarded as the top pitching prospect for fantasy owners in 2015 and he has been so dang disappointing. The crux of his issues is an affinity for walks, as he entered last night’s start with a ghastly 5.31 BB/9, the worst such mark among SPs with at least 80 IP. Well, he didn’t care about that Tuesday’s evening as he featured a line of 7.0 IP, 0 ER, 4 Hits, 1 BB, 11 Ks and showed us why we loved him in the first place. Now, I don’t this is “a brand new Rodon” so be careful touching that hot hot hot plate of goodness. Rodon had allowed 19 ER in his last four starts combined, and featured a FIP and xFIP of 4.00 despite a stellar 9.57 K/9. He’s the third rate Danny Salazar, or a second rate Taijuan Walker. If you’ve got nothing to lose, sure, go for it. But for the rest of us, let him be someone else’s headache for the final stretch of the season.
Let’s see what every other SP did yesterday:
Joe Ross – 4.2 IP, 5 ER, 6 Hits, 4 BBs, 1 K. I normally don’t talk about bad starts early, but I wanted y’all to make sure I wasn’t hiding this one after propping Ross up a ton. Here’s a fun stat: Ross doubled his season walk total in this eighth start of the season. He was actually performing well for the first three innings, then started looking shaky in the fourth where the wheels fell off. Yes I still love him, yes I believe that he will pick it up and not start acting like his big brother all of a sudden, no I do not think this has to do with pitching more innings than last year. He’ll bounce back and I’d be snatching him up in leagues where he’s dropped.
Madison Bumgarner – 9.0 IP, 1 ER, 5 Hits, 0 BBs, 12 Ks. Aces going gosh-darn-tootilly-ace.
Matt Harvey – 8.0 IP, 0 ER, 4 Hits, 0 BBs, 4 Ks. Can I just abbreviate it AGA?
Carlos Carrasco – 8.0 IP, 2 ER, 4 Hits, 0 BBs, 8 Ks. AGA. See it totally works, though it does make you kinda sound like a neanderthal if you don’t use the acronym. It’s actually an initialism, saying it like a real word would be an acronym. Ahhh, you’re one of those people.
Jeremy Hellickson – 8.0 IP 0 ER, 7 Hits, 0 BBs, 6 Ks. Here’s one I haven’t gotten to use in a while! Blame it on the Phillies.
Erasmo Ramirez – 7.0 IP, 0 ER, 5 Hits, 0 BBs, 4 Ks. Did you know that the Braves have the worst slugging percentage in the majors?
Yordano Ventura – 6.0 IP, 0 ER, 2 Hits, 6 BBs, 8 Ks. Leave it Yordano to have the incredible stuff to strike out eight batters in six innings and only allow two hits, but still not have the ability to prevent walking six batters. You’d think he’d get the memo after issuing his fifth free pass, but nooooooo not Yordano.
Drew Hutchison – 7.0 IP, 2 ER, 4 Hits, 2 BBs, 6 Ks. Was this game played at home? Checks notes written by my secretary who doesn’t exist but damn well should. Yes it was, thanks…Stacy!
Zack Greinke – 6.0 IP, 0 ER, 6 Hits, 1 BB, 6 Ks. AGA. I dunno. It doesn’t have the same ring to it like “haters gonna hate”. I feel like I’m part of the Amateur Golf Association and that’s not a plus.
Yovani Gallardo – 5.2 IP, 0 ER, 2 Hits, 3 BBs, 1 K. Huh, what a weird outing. Well whatever, I’m not trusting you, sorry bud.
Williams Perez – 8.0 IP, 2 ER, 4 Hits, 4 BBs, 1 K. Those four walks are there to remind us that you’re not very good Perez. ‘preciate it.
Carlos Martinez – 8.0 IP, 3 ER, 9 Hits, 0 BBs, 8 Ks. Sure, you’d like a couple fewer hits and maybe 1 ER off the board, but you best be thrilled by that 8/0 K per BB ratio.
Taijuan Walker – 6.0 IP, 2 ER, 5 Hits, 1 BB, 6 Ks. Weird. A start by Taijuan that isn’t boom or bust.
Chris Rusin – 6.0 IP, 1 ER, 8 Hits, 1 BB, 5 Ks. Rusin has limited upside, pitches his home games at Coors Field, and doesn’t deserve a spot on your team. This should be the blurb for every Colorado starter.
Kyle Gibson – 6.0 IP, 2 ER, 7 Hits, 2 BBs, 7 Ks. Is he worthy of the MFRTSPA? I dunno, we’ll throw a rock into a fish tank and see which one touches it first to decide. Yeah, that’s a thing I swear.
Hector Santiago – 5.1 IP, 3 ER, 4 Hits, 1 BB, 4 Ks. Santiago is pretty far on his way down at this point. Don’t go blindly starting him moving forward.
Luis Severino – 6.0 IP, 2 ER, 7 Hits, 1 BB, 2 Ks. A bit disappointing from Severino, but after a shaky first few innings, he got into a groove and performed much better. I still think he provides mid 40s value the rest of this season.
Dan Haren – 5.1 IP, 3 ER, 5 Hits, 1 BB, 6 Ks. Ehhhh still not a fan of your Haren.
Steven Wright – 5.0 IP, 2 ER, 5 Hits, 5 BBs, 4 Ks. I know it’s Dickey’s thing, but since he’s had some consideration from owners after two solid starts from this one, I feel like I have to remind y’all: Don’t trust a knuckleballer.
Kendall Graveman – 4.2 IP, 2 ER, 5 Hits, 1 BB, 4 Ks. I used my best joke for this fella last time and it still rings truth. Mediocrity is the Kendall Beall of Graveman.
Colin Rea – 5.0 IP, 3 ER, 7 Hits, 1 BB, 4 Ks. More than you’re standard Schmo as he’ll get some time in the rotation. He’s the top Padres prospect, but he’s a Matt Wisler type as he won’t strike out too many batters but can perform well with his solid command on a given night. I wouldn’t be looking at him unless I’m a deep NL-only league.
Scott Kazmir – 5.2 IP, 3 ER, 7 Hits, 2 BBs, 3 Ks. One of the worst starts you’ll see from Kaz all year. Don’t worry, he’s fine.
Anibal Sanchez – 5.1 IP, 5 ER, 7 Hits, 1 BB, 4 Ks. I mean, is there any point telling you guys that he’s bad anymore?
Jeff Locke – 5.0 IP, 4 ER, 7 Hits, 3 BBs, 3 Ks. Nah.
Taylor Jungmann – 2.2 IP, 2 ER, 5 Hits, 3 BBs, 3 Ks. A bit disappointing for the Lanky McLankster, but some errors from his defense didn’t help him escape innings quickly. Look for him to rebound against..The Phils? Awwww yis.
Justin Nicolino – 5.2 IP, 4 ER, 9 Hits, 1 BB, 0 Ks. I’m not mad, I’m impressed that he was able to get through 17 outs without striking out a batter.
Chris Tillman – 2.1 IP, 5 ER, 8 Hits, 0 BBs, 2 Ks. Is this end of Tillman? Well, he hadn’t started for a bit due to his ankle issues, and this start makes me believe that his solid run is coming to a close. Oh, and by the way, You can’t spell Win with Tillman.
Michael Lorenzen – 1.1 IP, 7 ER, 7 Hits, 2 BBs, 1 K. Ouch. Someone this wasn’t the worst start of the day. Everything is coming up Lorenzen!
David Buchanan – 1.2 IP, 11 ER, 11 Hits, 2 BBs, 1 K. You realize that Adam Dunn would have done a better job than this, right? Jeez that’s a rough day. Leave it to the Phils to not give a frick and leave him out there to dry.
Eduardo Rodriguez – Sure, you’re going to be a bit hesitant to trust Eddie, but going against the Marlins these days is less intimating than being barking at by a Shih Tzu.
Mat Latos vs. Cincinnati Reds – Ugh, I don’t like this stream and if you’re debating if you need one for the day, I’d sit out on Latos. Still, he has been a bit better since coming off the DL (ignoring his 6 ER blowup last time out…), and the best bet to succeed given the dearth of options.